Doesn't anybody ever update this blog?

School started last week, and because it's my second year on the job, I really hit the ground running. We had two major events--an art show called Girls! Girls! Girls! and a Women's Equality Day event--both of which were ridiculously successful, and we also initiated 20 first-year students into the Women's and Gender Studies living learning community. For more info, check out the brilliant new WGS webpage.

Because of all this activity, Biffle and I really haven't had time to reflect on our one year anniversary of living in Charleston--really more of an anniversary for me than for Biffle, since he's only really been living here since June. I have been here one year and 31 days. I have nothing profound to say about that, but I do have a couple of observations: last year, for most of the year, I accepted every invitation I received from everybody. If someone wanted to do something, I said yes. Now I find that I'm being more selective--I'm prioritizing. I've been here long enough to have a sense of which relationships I want to cultivate and which may stay at the acquaintance level.

I also have this observation: living with Biffle is really wonderful. We had a rough couple of weeks before the semester started, when I was irrationally irritable and moody (I got mad at Biffle for eating granola, for instance, and then burst into tears when he called me on it). Then one night at dinner, this microscopic internal shift happened, and I said, "OH! You're not leaving!" Every fall for the last seven years, he's gone away to school, so even though my brain knew that it wasn't happening this time around, my body was preparing for his departure.

Here's the kind of thing that happens now that we live together: Monday was a 14-hour day for me. At the end of that kind of day last year, I would have biked home alone, eaten cold cereal, and gone to bed. This Monday, though, I looked out into the audience of the Women's Equality Day event and saw Biffle there. And after the event was over, he drove me home and made me dinner. I was so grateful I almost cried.


The Dad said...

Yea Alison

It was good to talk to you yesterday. Since "they" are not having school today, you should have time to relax a little, maybe. Your life sounds very busy.

It is great that Walter and you are getting into a new phase. Together...

An interesting note, when I was talking to you yesterday about Ernesto and getting ready (candles, flashlights, shutters...), you said;
"I don't have to think about that, Walter is here".

I found that an interesting comment on a couple of levels. First, the interpersonal relationship between you and Walter.
Second, even though you are obviously a very self reliant person, subconsciously you know that Walter watchs out for and is aware of your safety more than perhaps you are of his (sort of like jumping off the Jet Ski in the middle of the ocean).

So, some of that may be just the Walter/Alison dynamic (how's that for a good term) and could some of that may be male/female. Hmmm...

OK, enough thinking...

The Dad

Maig said...

This post almost made me cry. If I wasn't in public I would.
I'm glad you don't have to prepare for anyone's departure. (Biffle how are your classes?) And I am tickled your events are successful and starting the year with a bang. You must be full of pride. I am happy for you.
Tues after a long day of teaching classes I came home to find a hot casserole I'd picked out and hadn't had time to make bubbling in the oven. Even though it was ater 9:00 Trey had waited for me and then we ate casserole together and went to bed. Happy times. :)

Slittle said...

1. Seeing and hearing about yours and Biffle's marriage makes it not seem so bad. Y'all have to be the sweetest married couple I know of.

2. I'm cranky that I'm not there for all the WGS excitement! But I'm tickled that I'm on the main page of the WGS website with a very soused (maybe just buzzed?) Shiple :o)

3. My mother does the granola freak out thing, too. Every summer. She gets crazy and mad and impossible to deal with. I've always thought it was an extended menopause, but I think I get it now.

Ok, I'll be in touch because I start work Tuesday!

femme fortis said...

Aww...I never knew you to be such a mooshy gooshy person! Weird.

The Mom said...

I've been trying to call you for days, and not getting anything but an answering machine. I've been without my computer, so I couldn't check to see if you'd blogged or not. I was very glad to get online tonight and see that you had updated your blog, and gave me some very good feelings for you! I'm so glad you and Walter are finally getting to experience an ongoing together relationship.

Love you both!

Pam said...

Boy, can I relate to the cereal thing. Having dinner made after a long day - wow. It would make me cry too.