Part one: not a movie review blog... Part two: artist in residence

Part One:

Alison and i went to see Little Miss Sunshine last night and really enjoyed it. I suggest you go see it. I don't think that this could be considered a spoiler, but just in case you don't want to know anything at all about the movie , don't read the rest of this paragraph: It is my own personal interpretation that this movie offered a subtle and beautiful update on the Golden Rule (you know, the one where you should do unto others how you want them to do unto you). That update is this:

We're all gonna be losers unless we make sure our brothers and sisters and children are winners.

[to that thought i want to add this: i think that's the one of the central messages i've been privileged to learn from the Piepmeier clan. (and, on a personal note, i hope that can continue to be one of the central messages of ALL the members of the Piepmeier clan...)].

Alright. All that said i want to get on to this:

Part Two:

I have an overall goal down here in Charleston. I want to create the position of, and hold the title of, the City of Charleston's Artist-in-Residence. Mostly, it would be something of a non-position. Like being poet laureate, i guess. But, beyond that, it could have real benefit--and particularly for me. For instance, one of the things those who know me well have heard me say over and over again is this: "Well, When I'm Mayor..."

Of course, we all know that's total crap. I wouldn't elect myself mayor of my own house. But i would make me artist-in-residence. Here's the first thing i'd try to convince the city of doing as its artist-in-residence:

Building the nation's first urban elevated bike path.

This bike path would be a thirty-foot wide, possibly paved trail that ran down the center of the Charleston peninsula from the North Central neighborhood all the way to as close to the Battery as the rich folks would let it get. Gradual ramps on either/or east and west--just like an interstate--would be the means of entrance and exit. These ramps would of course have to fall in the most convenient places but shouldn't be over a half mile apart at any one spot. This elevated trail would be tree-lined, either in the center or on the sides. The sides would be better because that could provide a buffer for pedestrian use also. These trees also help deal with the run-off caused by rain onto a flat paved surface forty feet in the air. The aesthetics would be along the lines of the blacksmithed iron gates and fences we have here in town.

Just think. No car traffic or on-street parking is disrupted by bike lanes. The political clout of being the first southern city to embrace such a foward-thinking/beautiful/ecologically sound/neighbor-friendly civic project would raise Charleston's already high national standing into the stratosphere. Portland, Ore. would wish it could move here! If you really wanted to get carried away, the EL-BEE (for elevated bike path) as it would lovingly be referred to locally could even have small shops on either side (creating even more real estate for people to flip).

Dear Charleston,

Need any more killer-ass ideas like this? I got buckets.


Cate Bush said...

I know I would love the ELB if it were in Charleston. Looking forward to seeing ya'll soon.


Charlie said...

Brazilliant. Just brazilliant. Even I would ride a bike if there were an El-Bee.