Hubrique, Anyone?

I have made up a word. Hubrique. It means excessive pride at your barbeque.

Now note i said at your barbeque, not about your barbeque. If you happen to make an excellent barbeque--and i mean, in particular, if you use a smoke-producing, slow-cooking method for the preparation of pig meat, almost assuredly a shoulder cut, pulled apart into strips, and are, furthermore, not referring to beef, ribs, or just a sauce--then i'm not talking about you. Go ahead, you're alright.

No, i'm talkin' about the people that, more than likely, are eating the above-described barbeque. Not to put too fine a point on it, but a Hubrique is precisely a barbeque, thrown by a person or people, in order to be excessively filled with pride.

Now the reason i can make this fine distinction about certain types of barbeques is that, during the warm months here in Charleston, a musician eats more barbeque than you can shake a stick at. Every gig i play it's more barbeque. I'm even thinking about naming one of the days of the week "Barbeque." Tuesday, Wednesday, Barbeque.

Already (and it's only March!) i've been to so many barbeques, and eaten so much barbeque, that i easily differentiate between, say, the "pre-wedding barbeque" and the "post-wedding barbeque" and, at this point, have moved on to such supra fine distinctions as "the pre-wedding barbeque involving mostly friends," "the post-wedding barbeque involving mostly family members," and "the sad wedding barbeque where everyone thinks that this marriage is a mistake" etc. These distinctions continue--to push an already tired comedic device to its horrible death--through such categories as "the office barbeque no one wants to be at," and "the church barbeque where everyone wishes they were drinking beer" until you finally reach, way down the list, Ta-Dah! The Hubrique.

The Hubrique even has it's own theme song:

Hubri-Q!
Oh, Hubri-Q!
Oh, Hubri-Q, honey, I love me,
Hubri-Q.

Now, having explained all that, i want to tell you about the mother-of-all-Hubriques , but i'm out of time.

Coming tomorrow: The Hubrique at I'on.